[Rhodes22-list] joke

Fri, 9 Aug 2002 23:53:28 -0400

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>From Mike Leone

IN THE BEGINNING

 In the beginning....
And God populated the earth with broccoli and cauliflower and
spinach and green and yellow vegetables of all kinds, so Man and
Woman would live long and healthy lives.

And Satan created McDonald's. And McDonald's brought forth the
99-cent double-cheeseburger. And Satan said to Man, "You want fries
with that?" And Man said, "Super size them." And Man gained pounds.

 And God created the healthful yogurt, that woman might keep her
figure that man found so fair. And Satan froze the yogurt, and he
brought forth chocolate, nuts and brightly colored sprinkle candy to put =
on
the And woman gained pounds.

And God said, "Try my crispy fresh salad." And Satan brought forth
creamy dressings, bacon bits, and shredded cheese. And there was
ice cream for dessert. And woman gained pounds.

 And God said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive
oil with which to cook them." And Satan brought forth chicken-fried
steak  from Cracker Barrel so big it needed its own platter. Man
gained pounds and his bad cholesterol went through the roof.

And God brought forth running shoes, and Man resolved to lose those
extra pounds. And Satan brought forth cable TV with remote control
so Man would not have to toil to change channels between ESPN and ESPN2.
And Man gained pounds.

And God said, "You're running up the score, Devil." And God brought
forth the potato, a vegetable naturally low in fat and brimming
with vitamins.
And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center
into chips and deep-fat fried them. And he created sour cream.
And Man clutched his remote control and ate the potato chips
swaddled in cholesterol. And Satan saw and said, "It is good." And
Man went into cardiac arrest.

And God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.....

 And Satan created HMO's...

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<DIV><FONT face=3DArial size=3D2>From Mike Leone</FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=3DArial size=3D2></FONT>&nbsp;</DIV>
<DIV>IN THE BEGINNING<BR><BR>&nbsp;In the beginning....<BR>And God =
populated the=20
earth with broccoli and cauliflower and<BR>spinach and green and yellow=20
vegetables of all kinds, so Man and<BR>Woman would live long and healthy =

lives. And Satan created McDonald's. And McDonald's brought forth =

the 99-cent double-cheeseburger. And Satan said to Man, "You want=20
fries with that?" And Man said, "Super size them." And Man gained=20
pounds. &nbsp;And God created the healthful yogurt, that woman =
might keep=20
her figure that man found so fair. And Satan froze the yogurt, and=20
he brought forth chocolate, nuts and brightly colored sprinkle candy =
to put=20
on the And woman gained pounds. And God said, "Try my crispy =
fresh=20
salad." And Satan brought forth creamy dressings, bacon bits, and =
shredded=20
cheese. And there was ice cream for dessert. And woman gained=20
pounds. &nbsp;And God said, "I have sent you heart healthy =
vegetables and=20
olive oil with which to cook them." And Satan brought forth=20
chicken-fried steak&nbsp; from Cracker Barrel so big it needed its =
own=20
platter. Man gained pounds and his bad cholesterol went through the=20
roof. And God brought forth running shoes, and Man resolved to =
lose=20
those extra pounds. And Satan brought forth cable TV with remote=20
control so Man would not have to toil to change channels between ESPN =
and=20
ESPN2. And Man gained pounds. And God said, "You're running up =
the=20
score, Devil." And God brought forth the potato, a vegetable =
naturally low in=20
fat and brimming with vitamins. And Satan peeled off the healthful =
skin=20
and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fat fried them. And =
he=20
created sour cream. And Man clutched his remote control and ate the =
potato=20
chips swaddled in cholesterol. And Satan saw and said, "It is good."=20
And Man went into cardiac arrest. And God sighed and created =
quadruple=20
bypass surgery..... &nbsp;And Satan created=20
HMO's... </DIV></BODY></HTML>

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