[Rhodes22-list] jokes

Michael Meltzer rhodes22-list@rhodes22.org
Thu, 25 Jul 2002 11:56:28 -0400


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by Rush Limbaugh, March 11, 2002

I think the vast differences in compensation between the
victims of the September 11th casualty, and those who die
serving the country in uniform, are profound.

No one is really talking about it either, because you just
don't criticize anything having to do with September 11th.
Well, I just can't let the numbers pass by because it says
something really disturbing about the entitlement mentality
of this country.

If you lost a family member in the September 11th attack,
you're going to get an average of $1,185,000. The range is a
minimum guarantee of $250,000, all the way up to $4.7
million.

If you are a surviving family member of an American soldier
killed in action, the first check you get is a $6,000 direct
death benefit, half of which is taxable. Next, you get
$1,750 for burial costs. If you are the surviving spouse,
you get $833 a month until you remarry. And there's a
payment of $211 per month for each child under 18. When the
child hits 18, those payments come to a screeching halt.

Keep in mind that some of the people that are getting an
average of $1.185 million up to $4.7 million are complaining
that it's not enough.

We also learned over the weekend that some of the victims
from the Oklahoma City bombing have started an organization
asking for the same deal that the September 11th families
are getting.

In addition to that, some of the families of those bombed in
the embassies are now asking for compensation as well.

(Mumf query: I'm just waiting to see how the Native
Americans will work this angle to ensure monies for the
their "reservations" -- what do you think? more slot
machines? Maybe we can work it so that, if a family member
that died is black, then we can double their "entitlement"
because if it weren't for their slave ancestors, they
wouldn't have been in that building, instead they'd be
enjoying life in Somalia or Ethiopia!)

You see where this is going, don't you? Folks, this is part
and parcel of over fifty years of entitlement politics in
this country. It's just really sad.

"Patriotism is not a short and frenzied outburst of emotion
but the tranquil and steady dedication of a
lifetime." -Adlai E. Stevenson, Jr.

Every time when a pay raise comes up for the military they
usually receive next to nothing of a raise. Now the green
machine is in combat in the Middle East while their families
have to survive on food stamps and live in low rent housing.

However our own U.S. Congress just voted themselves a raise,
and many of you don't know that they only have to be in
Congress one time to receive a pension that is more than
$15,000 per month and most are now equal to be millionaires
plus. They also do not receive Social Security on retirement
because they didn't have to pay into the system.

If some of the military people stay in for 20 years and get
out as an E-7 you may receive a pension of $1,000 per month,
and the very people who placed you in harms way receive a
pension of $15,000 per month.

I would like to see our elected officials pick up a weapon
and join ranks before they start cutting out benefits and
lowering pay for our sons and daughters who are now
fighting. "When do we finally do something about this??"

- submitted by Jay Pocius

--
Now I sit me down in school
Where praying is against the rule
For this great nation under God
Finds mention of Him very odd.

If Scripture now the class recites,
It violates the Bill of Rights.
And anytime my head I bow
Becomes a Federal matter now.

Our hair can be purple, orange or green,
That's no offense; it's a freedom scene.
The law is specific, the law is precise.
Prayers spoken aloud are a serious vice.

For praying in a public hall
Might offend someone with no faith at all.
In silence alone we must meditate,
God's name is prohibited by the state.

We're allowed to cuss and dress like freaks,
And pierce our noses, tongues and cheeks.
They've outlawed guns, but FIRST the Bible.
To quote the Good Book makes me liable.

We can elect a pregnant Senior Queen,
And the 'unwed daddy,' our Senior King.
It's "inappropriate" to teach right from wrong,
We're taught that such "judgments" do not belong.

We can get our condoms and birth controls,
Study witchcraft, vampires and totem poles.
But the Ten Commandments are not allowed,
No word of God must reach this crowd.

It's scary here I must confess,
When chaos reigns the school's a mess.
So, Lord, this silent plea I make:
Should I be shot; My soul please take!

Amen

- submitted by Rob Brucato

--
Each Sunday The Orange Register recognizes a letter that
eloquently expresses a viewpoint or engenders a debate on a
topic of public interest. Today's winner is Ann Baker, a
real-estate agent who lives in Huntington Beach.

It was our normal Thursday morning business meeting at our
real-estate office. No big deal. Before the meeting we hung
around the bagel table, as usual, with our coffee. He stood
aside, looking a little shy and awkward and very young, a
new face in a room full of extroverted salespeople. An
average looking guy, maybe 5 feet 8 inches. A clean-cut,
sweet-faced kid.

I went over to chat with him. Maybe he was a new salesman?
He said he was just back from Kabul, Afghanistan. A Marine.
Our office (and a local school) had been supportive by
sending letters to him and other troops, which he had posted
on the American Embassy door in Kabul. He stood guard there
for four months and was shot at daily.

He had come to our office to thank us for our support, for
all the letters during those scary times. I couldn't believe
my ears. He wanted to thank us? We should be thanking him.
But how? How can I ever show him my appreciation?

At the end of the sales meeting, he stepped quietly forward,
no incredible hulk. As a matter of fact, he looked for all
the world 15 years old to me. The older I get, the younger
they look!

This young Marine, this clean-faced boy, had no qualms
stepping up to the plate and dodging bullets so that I might
enjoy the freedom to live my peaceful life in the land of
the free. No matter the risk. Suddenly the most stressful
concerns of my life seemed as nothing, and my complacency
flew right out the window with his every word. Somewhere,
somehow, he had taken the words honor, courage and
commitment into his very soul and laid his life on the line
daily for me and us. A man of principle. He wants to do it.
Relishes it. And he came to
thank us? For a few letters?

I fought back the tears as he spoke so briefly and softly.

He walked forward to our manager and placed a properly
folded American flag in his hands. It had flown over the
Embassy. He said thanks again.

You could hear a pin drop. As I looked around I saw red
faces everywhere fighting back the tears.

In a heartbeat, my disillusionment with young people today
quickly vanished.

In ordinary homes, in ordinary towns, kids like him are
growing-up proud to be an American and willing to die for
it.

Wow. We'll frame the flag and put it in the lobby. He only
came to my office once, for just a few minutes, but I
realize I rubbed shoulders with greatness in the flesh and
in the twinkling of an eye my life is forever changed. His
name is Michael Mendez, a corporal in the USMC. We are a
great nation. We know because the makings of it walked into
my office that day.

 --Ann Baker, Huntington Beach

- submitted by Penny Turner

--


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<DIV>by Rush Limbaugh, March 11, 2002<BR><BR>I think the vast =
differences in=20
compensation between the<BR>victims of the September 11th casualty, and =
those=20
who die<BR>serving the country in uniform, are profound.<BR><BR>No one =
is really=20
talking about it either, because you just<BR>don't criticize anything =
having to=20
do with September 11th.<BR>Well, I just can't let the numbers pass by =
because it=20
says<BR>something really disturbing about the entitlement =
mentality<BR>of this=20
country.<BR><BR>If you lost a family member in the September 11th=20
attack,<BR>you're going to get an average of $1,185,000. The range is=20
a<BR>minimum guarantee of $250,000, all the way up to =
$4.7<BR>million.<BR><BR>If=20
you are a surviving family member of an American soldier<BR>killed in =
action,=20
the first check you get is a $6,000 direct<BR>death benefit, half of =
which is=20
taxable. Next, you get<BR>$1,750 for burial costs. If you are the =
surviving=20
spouse,<BR>you get $833 a month until you remarry. And there's =
a<BR>payment of=20
$211 per month for each child under 18. When the<BR>child hits 18, those =

payments come to a screeching halt.<BR><BR>Keep in mind that some of the =
people=20
that are getting an<BR>average of $1.185 million up to $4.7 million are=20
complaining<BR>that it's not enough.<BR><BR>We also learned over the =
weekend=20
that some of the victims<BR>from the Oklahoma City bombing have started =
an=20
organization<BR>asking for the same deal that the September 11th =
families<BR>are=20
getting.<BR><BR>In addition to that, some of the families of those =
bombed=20
in<BR>the embassies are now asking for compensation as =
well.<BR><BR>(Mumf query:=20
I'm just waiting to see how the Native<BR>Americans will work this angle =
to=20
ensure monies for the<BR>their "reservations" -- what do you think? more =

slot<BR>machines? Maybe we can work it so that, if a family =
member<BR>that died=20
is black, then we can double their "entitlement"<BR>because if it =
weren't for=20
their slave ancestors, they<BR>wouldn't have been in that building, =
instead=20
they'd be<BR>enjoying life in Somalia or Ethiopia!)<BR><BR>You see where =
this is=20
going, don't you? Folks, this is part<BR>and parcel of over fifty years =
of=20
entitlement politics in<BR>this country. It's just really=20
sad.<BR><BR>"Patriotism is not a short and frenzied outburst of =
emotion<BR>but=20
the tranquil and steady dedication of a<BR>lifetime." -Adlai E. =
Stevenson,=20
Jr.<BR><BR>Every time when a pay raise comes up for the military =
they<BR>usually=20
receive next to nothing of a raise. Now the green<BR>machine is in =
combat in the=20
Middle East while their families<BR>have to survive on food stamps and =
live in=20
low rent housing.<BR><BR>However our own U.S. Congress just voted =
themselves a=20
raise,<BR>and many of you don't know that they only have to be =
in<BR>Congress=20
one time to receive a pension that is more than<BR>$15,000 per month and =
most=20
are now equal to be millionaires<BR>plus. They also do not receive =
Social=20
Security on retirement<BR>because they didn't have to pay into the=20
system.<BR><BR>If some of the military people stay in for 20 years and=20
get<BR>out as an E-7 you may receive a pension of $1,000 per =
month,<BR>and the=20
very people who placed you in harms way receive a<BR>pension of $15,000 =
per=20
month.<BR><BR>I would like to see our elected officials pick up a =
weapon<BR>and=20
join ranks before they start cutting out benefits and<BR>lowering pay =
for our=20
sons and daughters who are now<BR>fighting. "When do we finally do =
something=20
about this??"<BR><BR>- submitted by Jay Pocius<BR><BR>--<BR>Now I sit me =
down in=20
school<BR>Where praying is against the rule<BR>For this great nation =
under=20
God<BR>Finds mention of Him very odd.<BR><BR>If Scripture now the class=20
recites,<BR>It violates the Bill of Rights.<BR>And anytime my head I=20
bow<BR>Becomes a Federal matter now.<BR><BR>Our hair can be purple, =
orange or=20
green,<BR>That's no offense; it's a freedom scene.<BR>The law is =
specific, the=20
law is precise.<BR>Prayers spoken aloud are a serious vice.<BR><BR>For =
praying=20
in a public hall<BR>Might offend someone with no faith at all.<BR>In =
silence=20
alone we must meditate,<BR>God's name is prohibited by the =
state.<BR><BR>We're=20
allowed to cuss and dress like freaks,<BR>And pierce our noses, tongues =
and=20
cheeks.<BR>They've outlawed guns, but FIRST the Bible.<BR>To quote the =
Good Book=20
makes me liable.<BR><BR>We can elect a pregnant Senior Queen,<BR>And the =
'unwed=20
daddy,' our Senior King.<BR>It's "inappropriate" to teach right from=20
wrong,<BR>We're taught that such "judgments" do not belong.<BR><BR>We =
can get=20
our condoms and birth controls,<BR>Study witchcraft, vampires and totem=20
poles.<BR>But the Ten Commandments are not allowed,<BR>No word of God =
must reach=20
this crowd.<BR><BR>It's scary here I must confess,<BR>When chaos reigns =
the=20
school's a mess.<BR>So, Lord, this silent plea I make:<BR>Should I be =
shot; My=20
soul please take!<BR><BR>Amen<BR><BR>- submitted by Rob=20
Brucato<BR><BR>--<BR>Each Sunday The Orange Register recognizes a letter =

that<BR>eloquently expresses a viewpoint or engenders a debate on =
a<BR>topic of=20
public interest. Today's winner is Ann Baker, a<BR>real-estate agent who =
lives=20
in Huntington Beach.<BR><BR>It was our normal Thursday morning business =
meeting=20
at our<BR>real-estate office. No big deal. Before the meeting we =
hung<BR>around=20
the bagel table, as usual, with our coffee. He stood<BR>aside, looking a =
little=20
shy and awkward and very young, a<BR>new face in a room full of =
extroverted=20
salespeople. An<BR>average looking guy, maybe 5 feet 8 inches. A=20
clean-cut,<BR>sweet-faced kid.<BR><BR>I went over to chat with him. =
Maybe he was=20
a new salesman?<BR>He said he was just back from Kabul, Afghanistan. A=20
Marine.<BR>Our office (and a local school) had been supportive =
by<BR>sending=20
letters to him and other troops, which he had posted<BR>on the American =
Embassy=20
door in Kabul. He stood guard there<BR>for four months and was shot at=20
daily.<BR><BR>He had come to our office to thank us for our support, =
for<BR>all=20
the letters during those scary times. I couldn't believe<BR>my ears. He =
wanted=20
to thank us? We should be thanking him.<BR>But how? How can I ever show =
him my=20
appreciation?<BR><BR>At the end of the sales meeting, he stepped quietly =

forward,<BR>no incredible hulk. As a matter of fact, he looked for =
all<BR>the=20
world 15 years old to me. The older I get, the younger<BR>they =
look!<BR><BR>This=20
young Marine, this clean-faced boy, had no qualms<BR>stepping up to the =
plate=20
and dodging bullets so that I might<BR>enjoy the freedom to live my =
peaceful=20
life in the land of<BR>the free. No matter the risk. Suddenly the most=20
stressful<BR>concerns of my life seemed as nothing, and my =
complacency<BR>flew=20
right out the window with his every word. Somewhere,<BR>somehow, he had =
taken=20
the words honor, courage and<BR>commitment into his very soul and laid =
his life=20
on the line<BR>daily for me and us. A man of principle. He wants to do=20
it.<BR>Relishes it. And he came to<BR>thank us? For a few =
letters?<BR><BR>I=20
fought back the tears as he spoke so briefly and softly.<BR><BR>He =
walked=20
forward to our manager and placed a properly<BR>folded American flag in =
his=20
hands. It had flown over the<BR>Embassy. He said thanks =
again.<BR><BR>You could=20
hear a pin drop. As I looked around I saw red<BR>faces everywhere =
fighting back=20
the tears.<BR><BR>In a heartbeat, my disillusionment with young people=20
today<BR>quickly vanished.<BR><BR>In ordinary homes, in ordinary towns, =
kids=20
like him are<BR>growing-up proud to be an American and willing to die=20
for<BR>it.<BR><BR>Wow. We'll frame the flag and put it in the lobby. He=20
only<BR>came to my office once, for just a few minutes, but I<BR>realize =
I=20
rubbed shoulders with greatness in the flesh and<BR>in the twinkling of =
an eye=20
my life is forever changed. His<BR>name is Michael Mendez, a corporal in =
the=20
USMC. We are a<BR>great nation. We know because the makings of it walked =

into<BR>my office that day.<BR><BR>&nbsp;--Ann Baker, Huntington =
Beach<BR><BR>-=20
submitted by Penny Turner<BR><BR>--<BR></DIV></BODY></HTML>

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