[Rhodes22-list] Political humor

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Attempting to Destroy CIA Tapes, Cheney Burns Down White House
Veep Apologizes for Accidental Inferno

The White House, one of the  most historic structures in the nation’s 
capital, burnt to the ground today  after Vice President Dick Cheney attempted to 
incinerate a cache of CIA  interrogation tapes in his office. 

According to White House aides, the  blaze started shortly after twelve noon, 
minutes after Mr. Cheney slipped out of  a cabinet meeting, saying that he 
had to “hit the head.” 

But rather than  using the bathroom as he had stated, the vice president 
instead went to his  office and put a blowtorch to a pile of CIA interrogation 
tapes which the White  House had feared might be subpoenaed in the near future. 

“I started  burning those things and boom, they went up like a rocket,” an 
apologetic Mr.  Cheney later told reporters. 

The accidental blaze quickly spread from  the videotapes to a nearby stack of 
transcripts of phone conversations involving  Speaker of the House Nancy 
Pelosi, Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid and singer  Barbra Streisand that Mr. 
Cheney had obtained via a warantless wiretap.  

“Once those transcripts caught on fire, I knew the building was a  goner,” 
Mr. Cheney said. “There were literally thousands and thousands of pages  of 
that stuff.” 

Speaking in front of the charred remains of the historic  building, 
administration spokesperson Dana Perino said that the White House  might have been s
aved had it not been for an unfortunate bureaucratic mix-up:  “Instead of calling 
the fire department, President Bush called FEMA.” 



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