[Rhodes22-list] Airlines to Offer ‘Fuel for Purchase’ Option (Humor)

[R22RumRunner at aol.com]

In the latest cost-cutting move intended to rescue the beleaguered airlines  
industry, representatives of the nation’s major carriers announced today that  
they would no longer offer complimentary jet fuel but that such fuel would be 
 available for purchase on board most domestic flights. 

American Airlines  spokesperson Carol Foyler announced the company’s decision 
to institute a “fuel  for purchase” option at a press conference in Chicago, 
arguing that such a move  was “long overdue.” 

“The reason airplanes use so much fuel is that the  passengers weigh them 
down,” Ms. Foyler said. “Especially the fatties.”  

Ms. Foyler said that the decision to move to a “fuel for purchase”  system 
sent a strong signal that “it’s time for passengers to stop being part of  the 
problem and start being part of the solution.” 

The airlines  spokesperson said that once a flight has departed, flight 
attendants will ask  the passengers to chip in for the fuel necessary to reach 
their final  destination. 

“If you’re on a transcontinental flight, the choice will be  the consumer’s,”
 she said. “Do you want to go all the way from New York to Los  Angeles, or 
will you settle for Cleveland?” 

Davis Logsdon, a professor  at the University of Minnesota’s Beleaguered 
Industries Institute said that the  major airlines’ decision to instate a “fuel 
for purchase” program might drive  consumers elsewhere. 

“Passengers who don’t want to spring for in-flight  fuel could opt to fly 
JetBlue, which never takes off to begin with,” he said.  


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