[Rhodes22-list] Fw: Home projects

[Brad Haslett]

Elle,

My hangar mate called me on my way to work last week and said he'd locked
his truck in the hangar with the keys to the hangar in the truck.  I phoned
my students to let them know I'd be late and turned around to rescue my
partner.  This weekend I put an electronic door lock on the hangar door so
we don't have to keep-up with keys.  The new lock does have two keys in case
the batteries are dead.  I put one key on my key chain and looked all over
the hangar for the other one, finally giving-up and deciding to have a
duplicate made.  I e-mailed my partner with the keypad combination for
access and he called me a few hours later, "what's this key taped to my
toolbox?"  "Uh, that's where I put your key so I wouldn't forget where I put
your key."

Sometimes "de-seniorization" projects don't go so smoothly.

Brad

On Tue, Aug 12, 2008 at 1:24 PM, elle <watermusic38 at yahoo.com> wrote:

> I'm in here...where are you??? :^)
>
> elle
>
>
>
> > > You are in the middle of some kind of project around
> > the house: mowing the lawn, putting a new fence in,
> > painting the living room, or whatever.  You are hot and sweaty,
> > coveredin dirt or paint. You have your old work clothes on.
> > You know the outfit - shorts with the hole in crotch, old
> > > T-shirt with a stain from who knows what, and an old
> > pair of tennis shoes.
> > >
> > >               Right in the middle of this great home
> > > improvement project you realize you need to run to
> > Wal-Mart
> > > to get something to help complete the job.
> > >
> > >               Depending on your age you might do the
> > > following:
> > >
> > >
> > >               In your 20's:
>
> > >
> > >               Stop what you are doing. Shave, take a
> > > shower, blow dry your hair, brush your teeth, floss,
> > and put
> > > on clean clothes. Check yourself in the mirror and
> > flex. Add
> > > a dab of your favorite cologne because you never know,
> > you
> > > just might meet some hot chick while standing in the
> > > checkout lane. You went to school with the pretty girl
> > > running the register.
> > >
> > >
> > >               In your 30's:
> > >
>
> > >               Stop what you are doing, put on clean
> > shorts
> > > and shirt. Change shoes.  You married the hot chick so
> > no
> > > need for much else. Wash your hands and comb your
> > hair.
> > > Check yourself in the mirror. Still got it. Add a shot
> > of
> > > your favorite cologne to cover the smell.  The cute
> > girl
> > > running the register is the kid sister to someone you
> > went
> > > to school with.
> > >
> > >
> > >               In your 40's:
> > >
> > >               Stop what you are doing. Put a
> > sweatshirt
> > > that is long enough to cover the hole in the crotch of
> > your
> > > shorts. Put on different shoes and a hat.  Wash your
> > hands.
> > > Your bottle of Brute Cologne is almost empty so you
> > > don't want to waste any of it on a trip to
> > Wal-Mart.
> > > Check yourself in the mirror and do more sucking in
> > than
> > > flexing.  The spicy young thing running the register
> > is your
> > > daughter's age and you feel weird thinking she is
> > spicy.
> > >
> > >
> > >               In your 50's:
> > >
> > >               Stop what you are doing. Put a hat on,
> > wipe
> > > the dirt off your hands onto your shirt. Change shoes
> > > because you don't want to get dirt in your new
> > sports
> > > car. Check yourself in the mirror and you swear not to
> > wear
> > > that shirt anymore because it makes you look fat. The
> > cutie
> > > running the register smiles when she sees you coming
> > and you
> > > think you still have it. Then you remember the hat you
> > have
> > > on is from Buddy's Bait & Beer Bar and it
> > says,
> > > 'I Got Worms.'
> > >
> > >
> > >               In your 60's:
> > >
> > >               Stop what you are doing. No need for a
> > hat
> > > anymore. Hose the dog shit off your shoes. The mirror
> > was
> > > shattered when you were in your 50's. You hope you
> > have
> > > underwear on so nothing hangs out the hole in you
> > pants.
> > > The girl running the register may be cute, but you
> > don't
> > > have your glasses on so you are not sure.
> > >
> > >
> > >               In your 70's:
> > >
> > >               Stop what you are doing. Wait to go to
> > > Wal-Mart until they have your prescriptions ready,
> > too.
> > > Don't even notice the dog shit on your shoes.  The
> > young
> > > thing at the register smiles at you because you remind
> > her
> > > of her grandfather.
> > >
> > >
> > >               In your 80's:
> > >
> > >               Stop what you are doing. Start again.
> > Then
> > > stop again. Now you remember you needed to go to
> > Wal-Mart.
> > > Go to Wal-Mart and wander around trying to think what
> > it is
> > > you are looking for. Fart out loud and you think
> > someone
> > > called out your name. You went to school with the old
> > lady
> > > who greeted you at the front door.
>
>
>
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