[Rhodes22-list] Only in America... (Humor)

[elle]

Thanks, Hank. I've read them before, actually had used
them in the classroom to get things rolling, but they
certainly can bear repeating.

Sure is a long winter....;^)

elle
--- Hank <hnw555 at gmail.com> wrote:

>    *Spread the Stupidity** *
> 
> 
> *Only in America ......do drugstores make the sick
> walk all the way to the
> back of *
> *the store to get their prescriptions while healthy
> people can buy
> cigarettes at the front. **
> 
> **
> 
> 
> Only in America ......do people order *
> *double cheeseburgers, large fries, and** *  *a diet
> coke. *
> *
> **
> 
> 
> Only in America ......do banks leave both doors open
> and then chain the pens
> to *  * the counters. *
> *
> **
> 
> 
> Only in America ......do we leave cars *
> *worth thousands of dollars in the *
> *driveway and put our useless junk in the garage. **
> 
> **
> 
> 
> Only in America ......do we buy hot dogs in packages
> of ten and buns in
> packages of eight. **
> 
> **
> 
> 
> Only in America ......do we use the word 'politics'
> to describe the process
> so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics'
> meaning 'bloodsucking
> creatures'. **
> 
> **
> 
> 
> Only in America ......do they have drive-up ATM
> machines with Braille
> lettering.** **
> 
> **~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~*
> *
> 
> EVER WONDER .... **
> 
> **
> Why the sun lightens our hair,
> but darkens our skin** **?** **
> *
> *
> Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth
> closed? **
> 
> **
> Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins
> Lottery"?** **
> 
> **
> Why is "abbreviated" such a long word? **
> 
> **
> Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
> **
> 
> **
> Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and
> dishwashing liquid made
> with real lemons? **
> 
> **
> Why is the man who invests all your money called a
> broker? **
> 
> **
> Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic
> called rush hour? **
> 
> **
> Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food? **
> 
> **
> Why didn't Noah swat those two** **  ** mosquitoes?
> *
> *
> **
> Why do they sterilize the needle for *  * lethal
> injections? *
> *
> You know that indestructible black box that is used
> on airplanes? Why don't
> they make the whole plane out of that stuff?! **
> **
> Why don't sheep shrink when it rains? *
> *
> Why are they called apartments whenthey are all
> stuck together?** **
> 
> 
> 
> 
> **If con is the opposite of pro, *
> *is Congress the opposite of progress?** **
> 
> **
> If flying is so safe,
> why do they call the airport the terminal? **
> 
> **
> **Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your
> turn to spread the
> stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring
> a smile to *
> *(maybe even a chuckle)...*
> *in other words, send it to everyone. We all need to
> smile every once in a
> while. *
> 
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We can't change the angle of the wind....but we can adjust our sails.

 1992 Rhodes 22   Recyc '06  "WaterMusic"   (Lady in Red)


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