[Rhodes22-list] Idiotic People Rant

[Herb Parsons]

I've heard lots of songs and artists myself. Well, at least until the
mid-80's, when I got tired of "new stuff", and I'm on your side on this
one.

I've never heard of "such and such" OR the band "so and so", either;
but I'd have to say, their imagination for song titles and band names is
severely lacking...

In the computer industry, and I'm about to reveal a trade secret. I
probably shouldn't, but I'm getting older so I have an excuse. We have
an error called ID: Ten-T. If you use the term, it sounds very official,
and those not "in the know" will usually look at you with a blank
expression, and let you continue with whatever your doing, since the
problem appears to have an official sounding error.

I wrote it out the way I did, because writing the shorter version would
have given it away too soon, and the story wouldn't have been as much
fun. If you spell it ID10T, the meaning gets more obvious.

Anyway, here are two of my favorite ID: Ten T stories. Both of these
are true, I was there when the phone calls came in for both; though I
didn't actually hear the conversations on the other end, I saw the
expressions on the person taking the phone call's face, and have no
reason to doubt what I was told when they hung up.

I was talking one of our sales reps at the computer consulting firm I
worked for, when she took a call. She explained that she didn't think
we'd be able to help the caller, that his information was not easily
retrievable, and likely couldn't be retrieved at all, and recommended a
data recovery company. When she hung up, I asked what happened. The guy
had a working Windows NT system, and lost power. After it came back up,
the system "asked him several questions", which he quickly answered
(meaning he didn't read what it said, just kept hitting the OK button).
He said the system eventually came back up, but had none of their
information or programs on it. She (the sales rep) knew enough about
computers to know what had happened. He had left the installation CD in
the drive. Windows NT 4 was one of the first installation systems to
autoboot, and all of the questions defaulted to a system installed. He'd
successfully reinstalled the system, erasing all his data in the
process.

*-

Another happened with the same company, but the guy taking the call
didn't work for us, he worked for our client. I had been assigned to
work at a client site doing system installs and 3rd level system
support, which meant when I wasn't doing installs, I was hanging around
in the call room. I was chit-chatting with the late night call guy. That
company used Microsoft's SMS, which (among other things) allowed the
help desk guys to take over the system to see what's happening, and to
fix things without having to be in front of the other computer. A
message would pop up (similar to the message you get now if you use
Remote Desktop) stating that someone was attempting to connect to the
computer, with OK and DECLINE buttons.

He told the caller, "I'm going to take over your computer, and I need
you to tell it it's OK." Then he started laughing, so hard he covered up
the phone for a few seconds. Then he said "click the OK button...OK, I
see the problem", and took about 30 seconds to finish it, thanked him,
and hung up the phone.

I asked what had happened that was so funny; "When I said 'I need you
tell it it's OK', this guy yelled at his computer 'It's OK!!'..."

*-

OK, neither is as good as Slim's story, but when you work in a geek
job, you take what you can get...

Herb Parsons

S/V O'Jure
1976 O'Day 25
Lake Grapevine, N TX

S/V Reve de Papa
1971 Coronado 35
Lake Pontchartrain, Louisiana Coast 

>>> salm at mn.rr.com 10/8/2006 4:23:19 am >>>
As many of you know I sing and play the piano for a living.  I always
take
requests and try my best to accommodate everyone.  I've been doing this
a
long time and I know thousands of songs.  It's not that I can't be
stumped--nobody knows every song--but if I don't know your request I
might
know another song by the same artist or maybe another song in the same
vein
or at least a song "with a lot of the same notes."

When someone asks for a song I don't know I just say, "Sorry, I don't
know
that one.  What else can I do for you?"  But tonight something
happened
that's happened countless times--maybe hundreds of times and it never
ceases
to amaze me.  The conversation goes like this:

"Hey, play 'such and such'!"

"Sorry, I've never even heard of that one.  Who's it by?"

"It's by 'so and so'.

"I've never heard of them."

"Sure you have, it's 'so and so'.

"Sorry, don't know it."

"Sure you do--play it!"

"No really.  I don't know that one--never heard of it."

"Play it anyway!"   (That's my favorite comeback.)

"I can't.  I've never heard it."

"Here's ten bucks--now play it!"   (Actually a legitimate strategy on
his
part because of course I pay more attention to ten-dollar requests.)

"You could give me a hundred bucks but I still don't know it."

"How can you NOT know 'such and such'?"  (This question always baffles
me.
I never know how to answer that one.)

"Well, I guess because I suck?"

"You call yourself a professional and you DON'T know 'such and such'?"

"I'm not a real professional.  I'm just filling in tonight for someone
that
called in sick.  I'm really a truck driver."  (You have to admire my
patience.)

"PLEEEEASE PLAY IT!"

"Honestly, I'd love to play it for you if I could but I've never heard
of it
and I just don't know it.  Sorry, is there another song you like that I
can
do?"

"No.  I want 'such and such' and if you don't play it right now I'm
gonna
complain to the manager.  I gave you ten bucks to play it!"

"Money-back guarantee or in-store credit.  How about a Beatles song or
some
Rolling Stones?"

"No!  I want 'such and such'.

"How about some Van Morrison or Jimmy Buffet?"

"No!  Play my song!"     ...etc., etc., etc.

Well, you get the idea.  Here's an erect-walking homo sapien, native
English-speaker who is obviously a few slices of baloney short of a
whole
sandwich.  I've had this exact exchange so many times I can't count,
and
still I'm always stunned at the idiocy of some of these people who are
out
walking around and are allowed to have sharp objects.  Nothing much
rattles
me anymore on the job but I'm still amazed and amused when it happens
again
and again.

Thanks for reading my 4 am apres Saturday night gig rant.

What idiots have you encountered?

Slim

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