[Rhodes22-list] Breaking News : Somali Pirates in Discussions to Acquire Citigroup

[Bill Effros]

Breaking News : Somali Pirates in Discussions to Acquire Citigroup
By Andreas Hippin

   November 28 (Bloomberg) -- Somali Pirates, renegade Somalis known for 
hijacking ships for ransom in the Gulf of Aden, are negotiating the 
purchase of Citigroup.
 
  The pirates would buy Citigroup with new debt and their existing cash 
stockpiles, earned most recently from hijacking numerous ships, 
including a $200 million Saudi Arabian oil tanker. The Somali pirates 
are offering up to $0.10 per share for Citigroup, pirate spokesman 
Sugule Ali said earlier today. The negotiations have entered the final 
stage, Ali said.  ``You may not like our price, but we are not in the 
business of paying for things. Be happy we are in the mood to offer the 
shareholders anything."

   The pirates will finance part of the purchase by selling new Pirate 
Ransom Backed Securities.  The PRBS's are backed by the cash flows from 
future ransom payments from hijackings in the Gulf of Aden.  Moody's and 
S&P have already issued their top investment grade ratings for the PRBS's.

    Head pirate, Ubu Kalid Shandu , said "we need a bank so that we have 
a place to keep our ransom money.  Thankfully, the dislocations in the 
capital markets has allowed us to purchase Citigroup at an attractive 
valuation and to take advantage of TARP capital to grow the business at 
an even faster rate."

Shandu added, "We don't call ourselves pirates. We are coastguards and 
this will just allow us to guard our coasts better."