[Rhodes22-list] Wisdom from Larry the cable guy......HUMOR

[R22RumRunner at aol.com]

1. A day without sunshine is  like night.
2. On the other hand, you have different  fingers.
3. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the  spot.
4. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
5.  Remember, half the people you know are below average.
  6. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
7. Depression is  merely anger without enthusiasm.
8. The early bird may get the  worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese
in  the trap.
9. Support bacteria. They're the only culture some  people have.
10. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad  memory.
11. Change is inevitable, except from vending  machines.
12. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of  payments. 
13... OK, so what's the speed of dark?
14.. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong  lane.
15. Hard work pays off in the future.  Laziness  pays off now.
16. How much deeper would the ocean be without  sponges?
17. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet  engines.
20. What happens if you get scared half to death,  twice?
21. Why do psychics have to ask you your  name?

22. Inside every older person is a younger  person wondering, 'What the
heck  happened?'
23. Just remember -- if the world didn't suck, we would all  fall off.
24. Light travels faster than sound.  That's why  some people appear
bright until you hear  them speak.
25. Life isn't like a box of chocolates. It's more  like a jar of
jalapenos. What you do  today, might burn your butt tomorrow.
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