[Rhodes22-list] did somone say jokes 2

[ralphzeto]

Steve,
I don't approve of political jokes-----I've seen too many democrats
elected!!!
ralf
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Steve" <rhodes2282 at yahoo.com>
To: "The Rhodes 22 mail list" <rhodes22-list at rhodes22.org>
Sent: Thursday, November 20, 2003 9:05 AM
Subject: Re: [Rhodes22-list] did somone say jokes 2


> Like someone else said, Excellent job.  Remind me of
> some Democrats!!!!!!!!  How can they talk, with one
> foot in thier mouth, thier nose up the labor unions
> ass and on thier Knees praying for the enomony to go
> bad so they can keep thier jobs.  Should we make a
> bumber sticker on THIS:-)
> Steve
>
>
>
>
> --- Michael Meltzer <mjm at michaelmeltzer.com> wrote:
> > The soldiers are tired and lonely after spending
> > weeks in enemy territory.
> > To entertain them, the Major called for a dancer
> > from a nearby town. She
> > came, danced and when the first dance was done, the
> > soldiers went mad. They
> > clapped for five minutes.
> >
> > For her second number she stripped and danced in
> > sheer bra and g-string.
> > This time the applause went for 10 minutes. The next
> > number she danced
> > topless, and this time the applause went on and on.
> > The Major had to come on
> > stage and ask them to quiet down for the grand
> > finale.
> >
> > For her last number, she was to strip completely and
> > dance naked. The Major
> > expected the soldiers to make enough noise to bring
> > the roof down. But 10
> > minutes later, there is no clapping and the dancer
> > comes backstage.
> >
> > The Major asks her, "What happened? How come there
> > was no clapping this
> > time?"
> >
> > She replied, "Major, how do you expect those poor
> > boys to clap with one
> > hand?"
> >
> > ++
> > One day out in the Texas panhandle, a guy sees a
> > sign in front of a house:
> > "Talking Dog for Sale." He rings the bell and the
> > owner tells him the dog is
> > in the backyard.
> >
> > The guy goes into the backyard and sees a Black Lab
> > just sitting there. "You
> > talk?" he asks.
> >
> > "Yep," the Lab replies.
> >
> > "So, what's your story?"
> >
> > The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I discovered this
> > gift pretty young and I
> > wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA
> > about my gift, and in no
> > time they had me jetting from country to country,
> > sitting in rooms with
> > spies and world leaders, because no one figured a
> > dog would be
> > eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable
> > spies eight years running.
> >
> > "The jetting around really tired me out, and I knew
> > I wasn't getting any
> > younger and I wanted to settle down. So I signed up
> > for a job at the airport
> > to do some undercover security work, mostly
> > wandering near suspicious
> > characters and listening in. I uncovered some
> > incredible dealings there and
> > was awarded a batch of medals. Had a wife, a mess of
> > puppies, and now I'm
> > just retired."
> >
> > The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the
> > owner what he wants for the
> > dog. "Ten dollars."
> >
> > The guy says, "This dog is amazing. Why on earth are
> > you selling him, so
> > cheap?"
> >
> > "He's a liar. He didn't do any of that crap."
> >
> > ++
> > It was the first day of 3rd grade, and a new school
> > for Johnny. As a test,
> > the teacher went around the room and asked each of
> > the students to count to
> > 50. Some did very well, counting as high as 30 and
> > 40 with just a few
> > mistakes. Others couldn't get past 20. Johnny,
> > however, did extremely well.
> > He counted past 50, right up to 83. He was so
> > excited that he ran home and
> > told his Dad how well he had done. His Dad nodded
> > and told him, "That's
> > because you are from Arkansas, son."
> >
> > The next day, in language class, the teacher asked
> > the students to recite
> > the alphabet. Most made it about half way through
> > without much trouble. Some
> > made it to M and N, but Johnny rattled off the
> > alphabet right to W. That
> > evening, Johnny once again bragged to his Dad about
> > his prowess in his new
> > school. His Dad, knowingly, explained to him, "Son,
> > that's because you are
> > from Arkansas."
> >
> > The next day, after Physical Education, the boys
> > were taking showers. Johnny
> > noted that, compared to the other boys in his grade,
> > he seemed overly well
> > endowed. This confused him. That night he told his
> > dad," Dad, they all have
> > little tiny ones, but mine is ten times bigger than
> > theirs. Is that because
> > I'm from Arkansas?" he asked.
> >
> > "No, son," explained his Dad, "That's because you're
> > 18."
> >
> >  - from Jimi Pocius
> >
> > --
> > http://www.masswolf.com/missworld/missworld.html
> >
> >  - from Sue Greene, pictured here as Miss USA
> >
> > --
> > __________________________________________________
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